Man, i really love you guys. I can honestly say that I miss living with each one of you AND even though I still live in the same town as some, I miss being in the same house with all.
These past couple of weeks have been incredibly stretching, tough, awesome, a little lonely, and yet completely indescribable. So many teachers have warned me that this would be the toughest year, EVER, of teaching. I have never been so busy in my life, yet I have also never had to persevere and feel so good about it, ever. I'm pretty sure that out of the 130 students that I have, 60 of them HATE me, 40 of them think I should teach Spanish honors because I'm so strict, 10 are frickin afraid of me, and 20 are indifferent. It's so strange being a person that dislikes attention, yet i daily REQUEST attention from at least 120 people. Caring about people liking me has gone out the window, but caring about these kids has become my life.
I have a pregnant 16 year old, and an 11th grader who missed three days in my class because his girlfriend just had a baby. A kid in my 3rd period Spanish 2 class often looks at me like he is going to kill me, and then a girl in that class that called me "gay" in a note that i caught her passing(not homosexual, just incorrectly using the word to say she doesn't like to listen to me). My students range from wealthy, to dirt poor; extremely academically gifted, to barely making it in English class (let alone Spanish).
Truth be known, a wide variety of students. But I can TRULY say that I am growing to love them. Sure I might want to strangle Steven for always making excuses about why he didn't do his work, but, I am also sincerely thankful for being about to be a father figure to this kid that lives with just his mom. Or theres Jessica, who always lays her head down on her desk in first period because "Spanish just isn't for me", but what is "for her" is figuring out why her best friend is now homeless and got kicked out of mom and dad's house for being a lesbian. I am daily seeing God's purpose for me to teach these kids. The compassion that the Lord has given for me for people, seemed not to fit in getting a teaching job. Maybe thats true, but it sure does fit here at Shelby (God knew what he was doing!)
Hard times are not over, but looking back of the hard times that I have already had, I can tell you the harder it gets, the more it's worth it. As other teachers have advised, this most certainly will be one of my toughest years teaching, but as I have quickly learned and am thankful for, this has been one of the most rewarding acts of service I have ever experienced.
Ok sorry this is so long cough cough Jeff cough cough... but at least i didn't add poetry, right? Jk. i love you all so much!